a single woman's rant

boy meets girl, boy likes girl, boy asks for girl's number, and so it begins. that silly little dance of getting to know you where you have to invest time up front tolerating people long enough to find out if you are meeting them or "their representative." here is why i hate first conversations:

you ask me stupid questions that i don't feel like answering!

• "sounds like you're cooking, so you cook huh? you should cook for me." this really makes me NOT want to cook for you...ever.
• "do you have a picture phone?" why because you're going to ask me to send you a photo? please. stop. really.
• and my personal all time favorite: "so, i have to ask you this: you are gorgeous, intelligent, sociable...why are you single?" the word 'single' is spoken as though it were some communicable disease people try not to catch. did i ask YOU why you were single? no, i didn't.
  

this brings me to the real point of this post. why is it that a well adjusted, happy, single woman is called into question? people never seem to get tired of asking. co-workers, well meaning family friends, random guys...and it comes in many forms, but always with some rationalization or analysis about why: "you must party too much," "you're not crazy are you?" "oh i know, you've got a list." but if i were a man, would anyone ask me that question? i'm going to go out on a limb and say that the answer is no.

i could give any number of reasons why (i am single), but at the end of the day it boils down to one simple fact: because i want to be; and i should not have to justify that to anyone, least of all you, mr. met-you-in the-club-first-time-caller.

i dodged salmonella!

a very interesting thing happened at the grocery store today. i purchased a few items on the way to a superbowl party and instead of getting the short receipt i was expecting, it was long. very long. i quickly joked with the cashier about it's length. as i read the receipt, i realized that it was so long because there was information related to the peanut butter recall. i love clif bars and purchase them pretty regulary. they are great for that pre or post workout boost! i am also a fry's valued customer (you know, the little card you swipe when you buy groceries). as a result of my participation in the valued customer's program, the grocery store had information on things i had previously purchased, so they alerted me to return items that may have been effected. woah! i wasn't sure what was more disturbing;

1) that i might have salmonella sitting on my shelf or
2) that the grocery store tracked all of my purchases and can use the information in any way they see fit.

i like getting savings on the groceries that i buy and never gave too much thought about what the store might do with my shopping data. i do get coupons every now and then for items that i purchase, which i like...then, i started to wonder what else they might use it for. direct marketing? collaborating with my insurance company to determine whether i was a potential health risk due to the foods that i eat?! okay, a bit of conspiracy theory there, but really, where does it end? i haven't thought this out fully just yet. but i am keeping my frequent shopper card.

when i got home, i checked my cabinets only to find that oops! i'd already eaten the clif bar containing the bad peanut butter paste. good thing i didn't get salmonella!